Painting my nails red

Time[less]. 2019. One of the works in my Occupy exhibition

It’s exhibition time.

No more time left to hide or play small when your work is installed and on a wall. 

This is when you invoke all the stars and “fake it till you make it”.

Which seems like an ironic thing to say but being bold is not always what we have been conditioned to be. And it also questions the definition of “making it”.

Artists use all kinds of tricks to get themselves into the zone to create. They also employ strategies to get them through exhibition openings.

I’ve learnt over time to make an occasion of it, dress in my best, put on red lipstick, show up for others, but more importantly, show up for myself.

It’s that vulnerability where you find yourself questioning, is my work good enough, will people like it, will they buy it? What happens if you sell nothing or only one or two pieces?

I have had exhibitions like this before and planned events where only a handful of people showed up. Does this make me any less of an artist or person? Can my ego and my hip pocket survive another exhibition which isn’t a sell out?

So this week I have employed a new strategy. And it is huge for me.

I am painting my nails red.

This is after a life time of being a nail biter. I woke up a couple of weeks ago and realised my nails were unaccountably growing. Somehow I hadn’t bitten them.

It wasn’t a conscious decision, but it meant that I watched with wonder as they got longer.

Two weeks passed and then three. My nails reached the tip of my fingers. They needed filing and shaping. I’d catch the unfamiliar sound of them tapping on the keyboard as I worked.

That’s when I decided that this exhibition would be different. I would wear my red dress, red lipstick and have red nails. Maybe even lash out and buy some red sandals (Keens outdoor flat soles of course). It feels like a coming of age.

Maybe that too, is what we all hope for. That our artwork will mature like a good bottle of red wine. That it will be mellow and fulsome with enough body to keep you wanting more.

That’s what I am manifesting for myself in this next exhibition Occupy which is all about occupying time, space and the land. The traces of our habitation left to tell a story. Like art and writing, an immortality.

Exhibition @ Northern Rivers Community Gallery, Cherry Street, Ballina March 10-May 2. Join us for the celebration opening event. Book here for free tickets.

Still getting used to them….