Keeping Accountable

Mucking around with pastels, and the new pastel set I bought as a result

As an artist, I need to be accountable. It’s a strange concept to think of artists as having accountable positions if they are self employed. Surely you are accountable only to yourself. Absolutely!

However, that is probably the hardest thing to do. It is a discipline. There are no bosses looking over your shoulder, only yourself (perhaps your worst critic!)

So why is it important and more importantly how do you do it? I think it is all about having a creative practice, a habit of creating that puts a structure into the day. There are long to do lists when you work for yourself and it can be dispiriting if you don’t get them all done. However the actual creating, the fun bit, is always made room for in the day.

This week I was travelling for the first time in months, which seemed more extreme and harder to do than before. By the time I got back home to my studio I felt flat and uninspired. I knew I had to turn this feeling around but was unsure how to do this. 

I remembered that when I had a studio away from home, I stayed accountable to my designated ‘studio days’. I turned up regardless and would ‘muck around’ until I got myself back into the creative flow. That meant washing some paper screens or cleaning off my work bench and putting out some fresh paper and doodling, taking a line for a walk.

I thought of this when I was in my home studio. What could I do to reignite my inspiration? I washed some clothes, I cleaned the kitchen benches and then I sat outside in the sunshine and dreamed of a new project. Something big and expansive- but I needed more space.

I went back inside and moved the furniture in my studio around. I cleaned the floor and suddenly the space was there and I felt inspired again. My grandaughter and I mucked about with pastels which was fun. My daily collage with a map of grey and yellow gave further inspiration for a larger work, using pastels on black paper.

I had literally made a new map of my space and inspired by that map, I had new inspiration. My habit of creating no matter what, kept me accountable to myself and pulled me through. Now I as I write about this experience, it is another reminder to turn up for myself when I feel flat again ( and I know this happens often).

There are so many ways to be accountable to yourself - but showing up, no matter what, is the main thing. When you show up, you send yourself and the universe a clear message – I am here, I am willing, let the creative force flow into and through me. It is enough.

The daily 10 x 10 cm collage inspiring a new work with pastels on black paper up on my studio wall.